Sorry, I am crossposting this on all of my sites. I simply feel the issue is too important to ignore. Thanks!
You might remember earlier this year about the teacher from Port St. Lucie, FL who had her class vote on whether Alex Barton, a child with autism, could remain in her Kindergarten class. He was voted out, traumatized and refused to return to school. There was a great uproar and teacher Wendy Portillo was suspended without pay for a year with her tenure revoked.
The school board quietly reversed its decision this week..please read the rest here, and trust me, you need to read it.
Tina Cruz is a writer, wife and mother of three children, two who have high-functioning autism, one who has Asperger's tendencies. She advocates for autism awareness and education, as well as acceptance. She views autism as a growth process and the opportunity to connect parents for support as a privilege. She is the Special Needs Editor at typeamomLA Special Needs Kids Examiner at Examiner.com and her own site, Send Chocolate reflects her passion for her children and autism. Autism Sucks is her brainchild.
And we all share in this award, all of those who write here at Autism Sucks. You all are wonderful, and I am so glad you are here and a part of this.
About the award:
This award recognizes and gives value to:
1.- Commitment to Quality Education.
2.-Betting on the inclusion of Tics [children with tics] in the classroom.
3.-The effort of parents, professionals and educational centers in incorporating the Tics into the educational process.
4.-The struggle to defend, through the Teaching Values like: Solidarity, Love, Affection, Respect, Effort, Aid, Support, Sharing and Commitment, the future of our children and students.
5.-Recognize and value the effort of the families, professionals and educational centers for integrating effective conditions in the schools and in society for the children and special students, gaining them tons of love and allowing them all the resources at our disposal.
You can distribute this prize freely to those blogs that you consider to be working in these lines.
The Norms of distribution are:
1.-Publish the objectives of the prize and link to Recursos Educativos (Educational Resources).
2.-Publish a list of deserving blogs to pass on the prize.
3.-Communicate to each blog rewarded that they have won the prize.
I'm giving the award to:
califmom: she writes about Tourette Syndrome, cancer and homeschooling Sweet Schoolin': writes about homeschooling special needs kids Whitterer on Autism: autism blogger and so much more The Wonderwheel: two blogs on same domain, one about communication therapy, the other about autism. 5 Minutes for Special Needs: group blog about special needs
Thanks for your contributions to the special needs niche. You guys count!
Tina
the following is post from my personal blog, dated two years ago.
Trying to teach any child self-control is tough. When you are dealing with a child with autism, there are added challenges. It isn't that they can't learn, they do. It's just that with autism, often learning takes the form of rote scripts that are hard to apply to situations that deviate from the taught scenario. The ability to adapt just isn't there. I tell you this so that I can tell you this story.
Last night, J and I wanted to go out. We don't get a lot of opportunities to do that, because even though I have given birth to the World's Most Responsible 14 Yr Old, let's face it, leaving her in charge of two younger kids with autism is something to question. But last night, my littlest one said that J and I needed to go out. You need to understand that she was falling apart earlier, not so much in a catastrophic way but more in a "I am really whiny and complaining about everything" way. The Wii can do that to all of my children. Hell, it can do that to me!
JBean was trying to convince me that we needed to let them stay home. We were planning on a late movie, so there would only be an hour that the kids would be up. JBug puts them to bed for us. To assure me that I was making the right decision, JBean said:
"Momma, I can do what they taught us in Sunday School today... SPUD. Self-Control Pause Understand Decide
I can control my self!"
Most parents would be thrilled by this. Instead I took it to heart as my failure. When you homeschool, everything is your fault. I said to to J, "I have been trying to teach her this stuff for years, and she picks it up in five minutes in Sunday School? Maybe I need to send her to school to learn, because she isn't getting it from me. I'm failing." He looked at me and said, "She got it today because you have been going over controlling herself over and over again. Repeat, repeat, repeat. It clicked because of you." My eyes filled with tears, and I spoke..
"That was the right answer."
T, who takes it all too personally
Tina Cruz is a writer, wife and mother of three children, two who have high-functioning autism, one who has Asperger's tendencies. She advocates for autism awareness and education, as well as acceptance. She views autism as a growth process and the opportunity to connect parents for support as a privilege. She is the Special Needs Editor at typeamomLA Special Needs Kids Examiner at Examiner.com and her own site, Send Chocolate reflects her passion for her children and autism. She is the founder and editor here at Autism Sucks.
Hey everyone! Today I am appearing on Special Needs Kids Talk Radio, so come check it out! 10 a.m. PST and 1 p.m. EST (noon, CST). We are going to talk about autism, homeschooling and what it's like being the "odd one out" in my family. You can listen by clicking on the link, and then the little special needs square takes you to the show. If you register, you can also chat and ask questions for me to answer on air. Come and listen!
From the website:
We are talking to Tina Cruz today about homeschooling her 3 kids and being the only "normal" person in her household, which makes her the strange one. Tina has a great sense of humor, despite her trials and tribulations
This is the first time I have done this, so let me know you are listening. I am terrifiedbewildered nervous!
T, who hopes I don't stutter and say "uhm..." a lot
Tina is a writer, wife and mother of three children. The two youngest children have high-functioning autism and the oldest has undiagnosed Asperger's Syndrome tendencies. She advocates for autism awareness and education, as well as acceptance. She views autism as a growth process and the opportunity to connect parents for support as a privilege. She is editor and creator here at Autism Sucks. She is the editor of the Special Needs channel at Typeamom, LA Special Needs Kids Examiner. Her personal blog can be found at Send Chocolate.
The month of April has come to a close, and with it ends Autism Awareness Month.
However, so many of us don't have an end to Autism. It is an ongoing, daily struggle filled with accomplishments, setbacks, discoveries, joy and pain. It is a journey, and the topography changes moment by moment. However, it is filled with the most wonderful people you could ever come across.
But we as a community are fractured. Broken. Divided.
Split along lines that should not be there; dividing a group that needs to band together to help our children and our friends and family members gather hope and strength to face our special brand of challenges.
To help us weather this storm.
Here are some things I would like the Autism Community to really think about and consider making changes to in the next year:
Start thinking about what the future holds for our children on the Spectrum.
Our focus has been laser-like on the birth-to-three side of the disorder, and you will hear no argument from me that early intervention is key; but in our haste to put all of our eggs in one basket and cure! recover! heal! we have overlooked a large group of children on the spectrum that still need assistance - the Adults. All of these children grow up to be adults, and as they age, the assistance gets less and less. The transition from young adult to adult is equally as important to a child on the spectrum as it is for that same child during early childhood. We need to remember to look at their lives as a spectrum as well, and provide assistance throughout their entire lives.
Acknowledge that not all children can be "cured" of Autism, and that most are not.
This is what is fracturing the Autism community and giving false hope to parents. I am not Jenny McCarthy, my child is not "cured", and many of us need to be okay with that. My son is a teenager, and while he has grown by leaps and bounds, he still has challenges that will plague him the rest of his life. We need to be okay with the thought that this is a process. I tell my friends that have read Ms. McCarthy's books (I have as well for purposes of full disclosure) that I would like to see what she has to say in a few years when her son gets older. I think she will find that the "cure" she spoke of in her books is not the permanent one she was hoping for.
That money has been funneled into the wrong areas for far too long.
Many parents, myself included, are tired of hearing that more money from Autism charities are being funneled into discovering how this happened and which additives in vaccines caused this. Should we "Green our Vaccines"? Absolutely. Should we change the schedule? Probably. Should we be the only group saying this to the world at large?
NO.
We need to find another soapbox that fits the needs of ALL of our children on the Spectrum, not just the ones who get the most air and face time. Not just the younger ones.
If you are going to Rescue an entire Generation, it helps to make sure you include everyone, no?
Start building a community; one that serves ALL in it.
I had the pleasure recently to spend time with a group of kids and their families that cancer had touched in some way, shape or form. What struck me deep in my heart was the bond these people share, the closeness, the support. People from all walks of life, celebrities, sports heroes, all donate time, resources and money to support and care for these families in this scary, rough and expensive time. And they keep on giving and many pay it forward after they no longer need as much help. The Autism community has nothing like this, and quite frankly it breaks my heart. If we had had even one-tenth of this amazing resource to help families share, bond, get assistance, and gather strength and hope; it would be amazing. If this help is available to us currently, it more than likely has strings attached. Strings of "cure".
Remember that we are not perfect, and that there is so much to learn.
Take a class. Listen in on a Webinar. Read. Discuss. Tell your story; don't be afraid or embarassed. We need to learn from each other. We need to spread the word. Autism and Spectrum Disorders are relatively new to the world vernacular, and we need to raise awareness. That being said…
Don't scare people by sending frightening messages related to Autism.
Don't equate Autism to a plague, or a horrific act. Someone who I follow on Twitter sends out messages about Autism that only confuse and frighten people. Scaring people into learning about Autism only mixes our message even further. There are many people who are coming forward and revealing that they have ASD and grew up during a time when many had no idea how to work with people who had Autism. Their stories are inspirational, and we need to pay attention.
Appreciate how far we have come…
Autism has had more air time in recent months than in previous years. That's a good thing. The fact that there are services for our children, therapies and interventions to help our children grow and function in society is something to be proud of. The accommodations in the schools and the support staff to help our children has increased three-fold. It's wonderful to see.
…but remember we have so much further to go.
We need to do more. We need to ask for more. We need to demand more. We need to ask for more services. We need to build an infrastructure to support our families who have no idea what to do or where to go when they are just starting down the road. We need to help those still struggling down that road. We need to work with the medical community to build a stronger protocol to get testing and services for our children earlier than second grade.
So let's get together and feel all right.
Let's get together on our global message and remember to include everyone, not just the people that fit a particular (cured) category. Let's work together to spread the collective word that while some children see great improvement with different interventions; let's remember that one size does not fit all, and we need to look at the bigger picture for our children. The lifetime picture.
So, same time next April then?
crossposted on 5 Minutes for Special Needs
Shash is a mom of 2 boys, one with Asperger's Syndrome and one we're not sure where he'll land on the spectrum. You can find her tipping at windmills as a Teaching Assistant in an Elementary School. Shash also writes at her home blog, Diary of a Crazed Mommy.
By the word normal, I mean typical. Regular. What you expect to get when you get a kid. The word most people use anyway, whether or not it's PC these days or not...
I'll go ahead and say it: My kids are not normal. I can be OK with that to a point. There are a lot of people that are not normal. I sure don't mean to step on any toes here, so please don't take offense. I am in no way trying to insult anyone or anyone else's kids. But my sweet kids, they are not normal.
I have three children. E (boy) is 11, L (boy) is 6 and K (girl) is almost 2. E has Asperger's ADHD and OCD, L has high functioning Autism and K is speech impaired, very delayed in all areas and though not diagnosed yet, she stims and requires a lot of special accommodating, just like her brothers.
I suppose people feel sorry for me and my husband, but I don't want anyone to. I just would love for people to be more educated about this messed up world of Autism. How there are so many degrees, variations, exceptions, labels, theories, treatment options and it's confusing. It's not just that "your kids are delayed, they act a little strange, they'll outgrow it - hopefully". Not even close, thank you very much.
My kids look completely normal and sometimes you can look at them and would never know there is anything different about them. At first. But E has no social skills and flaps his hands against his legs and in his lap very loudly. He repeats things he heard over and over (yeah, like Rainman). L gets overwhelmed, sometimes freaks out and clamps his hands over his ears and will not take them off. He babbles like a baby in some little babble language he made up and can only put together a few words at times. K still eats baby food from a jar and still drinks from a bottle because she can't tolerate much else or she gags and throws up. She screams and goes ballistic if we go anywhere where there are too many people or there is too much noise.
The two older ones still have toilet issues and need pull-ups sometimes. They ride the special bus. They're in special ed classes. They have almost no awareness of how other kids their age behave, even when they are around them. They get upset and throw screaming temper tantrums if something we see as trivial upsets them. They don't get concepts other kids much younger than them seem to understand. We don't go to movies, the zoo, museums, the beach, the library, Chuck E Cheese,anyone's home or any other place that would be certain disaster should I be brave enough to try to take just one of them there. Too much light, noise, people, excitement, activity, etc. Yes, my kids have had complete meltdowns in public. The first rule that I learned the hard way is: don't make eye contact! When my kid starts up in public and it's getting ugly, I don't make eye contact with anyone! Focus on the child and deal with it accordingly. Yes, people look and sometimes they comment. So? I deal with my kid, not the ignorant person that isn't minding their business.
This is not even all of it. See, this Autism thing, way more than any parent bargains for..
You can't just give kids like this more discipline, or expect them to suck it up and act normal, or try to distract them with a toy or video or something. This is just who my kids are and it's all I know. And as bad as this sounds, please know that my kids are the sweetest, most beautiful babies to me. They are capable of loving us, and each other. They have strengths, skills, and something to offer. They are special and unique. And sometimes, they surprise when they do or say something typical.
I do make my kids behave, apologize when they have done something they should not have, and I am teaching them manners. I will not let Autism be an excuse for my kids to get away with doing anything that would be wrong or cause harm to others..
It's hard for me to relate to parents of typical kids. I will never know what it's like to have a normal child. And I don't know what it is that caused all of mine to have this. And it's not something I can really make anyone understand if they are not going through it themselves.
I hope this blog can help anyone that would like to understand more, either for themselves because they have a child with Autism, or as someone that wants to know more because they don't.
It's Autism Awareness Month - can't we all just TRY to get along?
We - mothers (and fathers) of kids with Autism are a community, divided.
I hate it! Hate is a strong word. But, it really sums up how I feel about this. It bothers me. We all have something in common, a child with autism. That should unite us, yet instead we are so very divided. Attacking each other for our beliefs on whether autism was a result of an environmental trigger or vaccines or genetic. Attacking each other for our avenues for our choices in therapies or interventions.
Why the hostility?
I have many many friends who are also moms of autistic kids, like myself. I'm part of several parent groups online and off and I wouldn't have it any other way. Some of my friends are like me and others very different. I have friends who do biomed and friends who don't. Friends who believe their child was autistic from birth & genetics and others who feel it was environmental or vaccines. I have friends with kids on the diet (like my son) and friends who think the diet is a waste of money. I have friends who do chelation and/or HBOT and friends who do not.
Those who know me, or read my blog know that I practice the GFCF diet for my child. I've also shared info on some supplements that he uses. I don't get into nitty gritty on dosages or meds we may or may not use as I don't think that's the general public's business. This past week I reviewed two books that deal with biomed - Jenny McCarthy's new book and LeeAnn Whiffen's book. Immediately I witnessed fallout among my circle of "friends" because I go on record as doing some biomed for my child. How dare I? I've taken a side. I'm Biomed. I'm the evil. I SUCK! Keywords: MY CHILD. Tonight, I am sick of walking on eggshells and trying to not offend anyone. This is my child we are talking about. What you do with yours is your business and I'm not chastising you for making different choices for your child. Keywords: YOUR CHILD.
I've made a point to be Switzerland as much as possible and not cast judgement or throw stones at others for their choices. Yet, I continue to be on the receiving end of stones and I'm feeling pretty beat up. When the community is so busy fighting and at odds with each other over causes and treatment, where is it getting? Nowhere, and fast.
-----------------------------
Hi, I'm hellokittiemama and I'm a mother of 2 very special children, living at the Jersey Shore. You can find me blogging my mad life with an autistic genius and a neurotypical diva, the gluten & casein free diet, vaccination choice, and more... over at The Bon Bon Gazette - because you know that stay at home moms really do sit around all day watching soaps and eating bon-bons. Got Bon Bons?
Parenting a child with autism really sucks, a lot of the time.
That's ok! here is where you admit it. a place to throw stones, throw down, throw up. Even throw in the towel. This is YOUR place.
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